Paper Mache Mayhem

What did the Boy say now?


The Boy:  Mom, this is my Lego guy Bleeker (sp?), he can run really fast and has a grappling hook.
Me: Wow.  He looks pretty cool!
three minutes later
The Boy:  Mom, this is my Lego guy Blaster, he can jump really high and has a a flame thrower.
Me:  Oh.  I thought his name was Bleeker?
The Boy:  (with total disgust)  Mom!  I put a hat on him!
Me:  How silly of me to have missed that.

Paper Mache Mayhem!


Yesterday, Hubby helped a friend move into his new place.  That left me and the Boy with the day to fill.  I don't know exactly what came over me, but I decided to be Crafty Mom!  I heard theme music in the background, a wind blew my craft paper cape making it ripple behind my back.  Hands were firmly on hips.  I was simply amazing!  I looked online and decided on a paper mache volcano.  But not just a volcano, it needed to be a volcano we could eventually make erupt!

Here are the problems, we don't have tape like the instructions require.  We also don't have any paint.  But I am Crafty Mom right now and that won't stop me!  We have food coloring to put in the paste and we can use the paste to hold the frame on to the water bottle.  Easy, peasy.  In my head, we stand side by side making flour paste on the stove, the Boy in awe of my know how.  We then construct the frame together, rip up some newspaper and paper mache the heck out of that thing.

We measure out the ingredients, put in the pan and began whisking away.  Wait, where is the Boy?  Wasn't he just here with me enjoying this bonding experience?  Oh, he's downstairs playing with Lego.  That's okay.  Once we hit the building part he will love that!  He loves Lego, why wouldn't he love that?

So with the paste made and the table all protected I called the Boy back up.  I tell him how we have to build the frame.  He says "Oh, I'll be right back.  Go ahead and start though."  I think that my little building genius has some great idea that would make this project even better!  I'm such a lucky Mom to have such an industrious little guy.  I have the frame half built now.  Where is he?  I call again to the basement again.  He tells me just a minute, he can't find it.  So I just about get this thing built and up he comes with safety goggles on looking very proud.  Are you kidding me?  I just built the thing by myself because he needed safety goggles.  Grrr.  Oh well, I'm not going to let this ruin our special bonding time.  And well, safety first!

It is time to begin the real magic.  I just know we are going to have the time our lives now!  What kid doesn't want to play in goo and build a volcano?  I really am a great Mom.  But wait, I almost forgot.  I have the only kid in the world who doesn't like to get his hands dirty.  He finds the glue completely gross.  His third piece in, he starts gagging because the glue is "soooooooooooo gross".  But, don't you worry.  He managed to drip some glue on my cloth covered dining room chair making those three pieces.  You know, the glue that has the blue food dye in it.  Perhaps that is why all those craft websites never suggested food dye in the glue.  I'm beginning to doubt my Crafty Mom status.

I get the glue off as best I can and get his hands washed.  But, I am determined to do this together.  I tell him why don't you let Mommy do the gooey part and you can tell me where to put them.  Two strips later, "This is boring" and off he goes to play Lego again.  I'm too far into this thing now to quit.  So, I completed our my volcano by myself.  After cleaning up all the mess, I made mac and cheese for dinner and had a large glass of wine followed by a half hour shower .... to get all the glue out of my hair.

The Boy and I snuggled up in the "big bed", our bed, and he drifted off to sleep.  I sneaked out and took another look at my volcano.  Hmmmm.  It doesn't quite look like the pictures we saw.  It's skinnier and maybe a little ( a lot ) skinnier on some sides as others.  It must just need to dry.  I'm sure that is it.  Maybe I should reconsider Crafty Mom status; at the very least I should switch it to crafty mom.  I'm not sure I deserve the capitals at this point.  Everything always looks better in the morning though.  I will hang on to that for tonight.

So this morning things are bright and cheery!  The volcano doesn't look any better by daylight, but the explosion is going to be fantastic! We anxiously await for Hubby to wake up.  9:00 is all we can stand.  We all get up and set up in the garage for the greatest explosion of the decade!

Have you ever played golf?  If you play like me, you play 17.5 holes of completely crappy golf.  But, there is this one shot that is amazing!  You connect perfectly, you hit with the perfect amount of force and the ball does exactly what you want.  It's the sweet shot.  It's the one that makes you think the next time someone wants to go golfing that you really love that game.  Well, that face at the end, that was my sweet shot of the whole project.

What's that Crafty Mom?  Wait, don't tell me.  I certainly don't want to go through all that again.  Oh.  You are right Crafty Mom.  That eruption would be better if we used Diet Coke and Menthos.  But don't tell Hubby we are talking again.